How to: Get Over An Ex

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Over the years, I’ve met them all. When I say all, I mean ALL.
Mr Always Skint, Mr I Forgot To Mention I Was Married, Mr Falls in Love Too Quickly, Mr I Accidentally Fell Into Bed With Another Girl, Mr I’m Allowed To Sleep With Other Girls But You’re Only Sleeping With Me – the list goes on.

I’ve been through what most girls have and more, I’ve cried sobbed screamed punched smashed things begged pleaded, and gone on long 6 hour walks on my own to ‘clear my head’. I’ve called them 77 times and sent them 149 begging pleading texts to please want me back and I’ll do anything for another chance – but I think one day, at a point in everyone’s life whilst they’re begging and pleading for someone back – what the FUCK am I doing?

When you’re in love you do things you normally wouldn’t do – that’s a given. Just like when you’re drunk. That’s where the term ‘love drunk’ came about – you act out of sorts when Cupid hits you with it’s fucking little bow and arrow.

I’m sure a lot of you reading this right now are probably so in love with someone it hurts – and I’m sure for a lot of you, they love you back. And I’m also equally as sure that for some of you, when Cupid was pulling back his little bow and arrow, he stabbed you hard in the chest, but for the other person… He just about scraped their arm and missed them by inches.

The worst thing in the world is unrequited love. What a cruel bloody thing to exist. Loving someone with everything you’ve got, only for them to like other girls selfies, ignore your whatsapps and then you find them in bed with another girl? Shit that hurts.

I find that when something like that happens, it’s always US begging for THEM back. Wait, hang on a second. IM begging for YOU back? When you cheated on me? When you crushed me and ruined my life? How’s that right or fair? But it happens, it happens to us all. You get to a point where you would blame the troubles of the world on yourself and jump through fire hoops whilst coated in petrol for someone. Someone who truly couldn’t give a fuck.

And I’ve been there more times than most people have had hot dinners which is why I put together a short and snappy list of how to not MEND, but start the healing process of a broken heart.

1) Remove all contact

I know the last thing you wanna do is unfollow him on Instagram and block him on Whatsapp but it needs to be done. We all know you’re gonna look, and be up at 4am on a Sunday desperately searching on his twitter for clues he’s moved on. You cannot heal a cut if you keep on cutting yourself in the same place – it’s the same for an ended relationship. You cannot close that book unless you stop reading the last chapter. You need time for yourself, when his posts aren’t going to be popping up on your newsfeed every three minutes.
And with his number in your contact list when you’re drunk it’s a recipe for drunken phone calls and teat delight. Get it all off. Now.

2) Think of the reasons why it didn’t work

When it’s over of course all you’ll think about is the good times – that cute walk on the beach during sunset, or that night in the hotel. But those were the good times like all relationships have. It wouldn’t have broken down for no reason and you need to remind yourself of why it did. There were more bad times than good and you need to actually process the thought that perhaps you are better off without each other in your lives.

3) Do something for you.

However long you’ve been with this person, you made it all about them and everything you did was all for him. Finally, do something for YOU. Join a class, change your hair colour, go to night school, go travelling, go on holiday, go on nights outs with your friends. Just finally do something for yourself which was impossible for you to do whilst you were with him.

4) Remember what you deserve

You don’t deserve to be treated like an option. There are plenty of options out there for him clearly, so let him take one of those. If any girl can have him, you certainly don’t want him. You’re not an option you are a choice. If someone wants to act single when you aren’t around then let them be single altogether. Life is too short to be with someone who doesn’t make you feel worthy and doesn’t make you smile.
There is too many people in this world who have wasted years and years of their life with the wrong person – make sure you are not one of them.

XOXO

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