Scouse Bird Problems – Secret: Review

Posted On: 24/03/2014

By: Scouse Bird

Imagine my despair when I found out the news that Mo’niques my favourite bar in the world was being sold. To quote the wise, modern day guru Nelly Furtado: flames to dust, lovers to friends, all good things come to an end; including where I choose to top up my vodka levels.

Thank god for small mercies though because at least they were keeping the same staff so it would still be a bit like the bar in Cheers where everyone knows me. I couldn’t make the opening party but I made it a point to go there on Boxing Night to see what had changed, if anything, other than the name. I dunno, I feel like it lost a little something atmosphere wise which I can’t put my finger on.

The name is a bit of a bone of contention for me. If someone asks you where you’re going tonight/at the weekend/Boxing night it was easy enough to just say Mo’niques, people knew what you were talking about. This time round though when people asked where I was going and I replied ‘Secret’ they just looked at me like I was bein a snotty bitch and refusing to tell them where I was going. This then meant I had to give a big long explanation about it being the bars name and where it is etc. I got bored of doing that after like the 10th time. But hey once word gets out that there’s a bar called Secret (not even THE Secret, throw me a bone here) I’m sure the explanations won’t be necessary.

Fortunately, not a massive amount had changed inside. The DJ box has moved to a bigger place in the centre of the stage upstairs where the thrones used to be (RIP Prinny thrones….where are they btw? Can I have one? Can I have both?), and the booths have all got chic, sheer black draped curtains on them so it all looks very sophisticated. They kept the birdcage with the swing in it! Hoorah! The music is the same which works for me because I loved it before but atmosphere wise, something’s definitely changed.

In summary: ok bar, great music, ok atmosphere….ropey name.

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