Scouse Bird Problems – The 5 Types Of Homo You'll See At Pride This Weekend (by a homo you'll see at Pride this weekend)

Posted On: 28/07/2015

By: Scousebian

Liverpool Pride kicks off this weekend and despite a controversial year with organisers falling out, pulling out and generally having a bit of a hissy fit, it still promises to be a boss weekend full of people being dead fucking proud an that.

For the Pride virgins, here’s five types of people you’ll be guaranteed to see.

The Baby D’s

Fresh out of College, rockin their Boy London vests, snap backs and hi tops. Wandering round like they own the place till they have two blue WKDs an end up on the floor cryin over a crush on their teacher. Mostly to be found in Jupiters playin pool. 

The Bitches

Gaggles of gay lads who usually stand on the outskirts of the action dressed impeccably and quietly judging every last person there. Try an geg in cos their shouts are fucking hilarious. Don’t let them see you though. You aren’t strong enough to withstand their snarls. 

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The butch/femme couples

Melts my head. What the? How the?

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The Drag Queens

Best eye make up, eyebrows an weaves you’ll see all day an night (if not year). Generally the queens of pride. Go an ask for a selfie with one an watch what happens. 

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The Straights

Those lads & birds who walk around pretending not to make eye contact with anyone as if they were only headin to Liverpool 1 for a Bar Burrito an they’ve accidentally wandered into full blown rainbow land. Prime targets for both the afore mentioned baby d’s and bitches. Guaranteed they’ll be in G Bar by 11 and won’t be straight by Sunday mornin. 

Have a boss pride everyone. I’ll be the one with me bird holdin me hair back while I vom in the gutter. 

XOXO

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