Festivals: V Fest


Well V Fest is over for another year *sniff* – if you were there then you’ll know how boss it was but if you weren’t, here’s what you missed:

The Line up

The line up was brilliant and for me personally, it was the best line up of any festival this summer. Sure, some had Kanye but he was far outweighed by the sheer quantity of quality acts at V. Highlights for me were Irish band Kodaline (I’ve embedded their High Hopes video below because I believe everybody needs to watch it… just have the tissues ready, it’s an emotional one), Kasabian who were on form as usual (by the way, you would 100% marry Tom but have a long standing affair with Serge, amirite??) and of course the amazing Sam Smith – that is one sick voice he has. I also didn’t know whether to love or hate Marina of ‘Marina and the Diamonds’ – on the one hand, what a unique voice and quirky act, but on the other hand she has the best figure I have ever seen… and my fella agreed. Fuming. 😡 Also James Bay will be getting played on repeat in the office for at least the next 4 weeks…

The Alcohol Situation

The searches on the way into the arena are more stringent than I’ve ever seen so the likelihood of being able to smuggle alcohol into the festival are pretty slim… but can it be done? That would be telling…. 👀

Also it says on the V website that camping chairs aren’t allowed into the arena but we didnt know this and just walked straight in with ours – so maybe the stewards don’t know that they’re not allowed? It’s a bit of a silly rule if you ask me, if it rains (which it did both days) then sitting on the floor isn’t really an option so it means a good 12 hours of standing if you want to catch all the acts. Boo V, free the chairs!

Everyday Sexism

There was one thing that really had me putting my ‘angry feminist’ hat on and that was the toilet situation. To be honest there was an adequate amount of portaloos, I will give them that (by the way, the toilets in VIP are fab but they’re MILES away from the main stage, which is a bit pointless, so you just won’t end up using them) but I was annoyed by the ‘Mens urinals’ – because that’s how they were labelled; “Mens Urinals”. I’m well aware that women, biologically, can’t pee standing up but this is the post industrial age and there’s not a lot of things that haven’t been invented and women can now buy a penis; they’re very effective. I made the stand (excuse the pun) for equality and used the “mens urinals’ with my She-Wee – I got the odd funny look from the fellas but just made light of it by informing them that my plastic dick was bigger than theirs. A couple of other girls were taking turns at squatting in between the urinals or squatting while friends encircled and shielded them and pissing in the middle of the field, which felt significantly less dignified. If the ‘mens urinals’ had just been labelled as simply ‘urinals’ or EVEN BETTER ‘Unisex urinals’ then I bet many more of the fairer sex would have felt encouraged to use them. I know a similar festival who have dedicated female urinals (or shepees) so come on V, get on board! All the other toilets were miles from the main stage whereas the “mens urinals” were right next to it – you could actually still see the main acts while relieving yourself! Make it fair!

Sassy Bird flag

Someone had actually made a Sassy Bird flag so that their group could always find each other in the crowd. I couldn’t believe it when I saw it and had to go chasing after them. That was pretty cool, you know you’ve made it when you’ve got your own flag! 😂



The big clean up

I think this is true for all festivals but when it comes to packing up and going home, people are actually animals. There’s always rubbish everywhere even though there are bins like right fucking there! Rubbish aside, the one thing I can’t believe is how many tents get left behind; and not even the shitty £30 ones, I’m talking the big ones that are worth a few hundred quid. Clearly putting a tent down with a hangover is just too much for people to cope with!

Just outside the arena there was a Halford’s stall where you could donate your tent to charity which I thought was a really good idea. So in summary, don’t be a gobshite, tidy up after yourself and put your tent to good use!

Can’t wait for V next year! Setting up the countdown on my phone right now…



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