Scouse Bird Problems – UK: Kendal Calling Festival

Posted On: 11/08/2015

By: Scouse Bird

Thanks to the amazing people at Funkin’ Cocktails, last week I popped my festival cherry at Kendal Calling. Due to hayfever season, Glastonbury will never be an option for me but I was delighted to be invited along to the 3 times winner of ‘best medium sized festival’, especially when I saw Snoop Dogg was headlining. SNOOP. DOGG. I mean, i heard rumours than he’d been banned from the UK because of his criminal record so getting to hear him dropping it like it’s hot was a treat indeed.

Here’s what you need to know about Kendal Calling:


Ok I’m gonna get this one out of the way first. It was all over the news that an 18 year old lad had died and several others were hospitalised after taking dodgy pills at the festival, which is a crying shame. So is the festival safe? Well yes. They had bag searches and sniffer dogs on the way in, an on site casualty and I saw quite a few people being arrested (presumably for dealing) – what else can they do apart from full on cavity searches? There’s only so much organisers can do to keep people safe; if people want to take shit they’ve bought off some stranger in a field then that’s on them. They are adults after all…

The line up

Surprisingly good for a festival I admit I hadn’t heard of. I was really looking forward to seeing Kodaline after watching them counting in the New Year in Dublin but unfortunately they had to cancel and were replaced last minute by the Super Furry Animals… who were weird to say the least. Snoop Dogg drew in I think every single festival goer on the site – everyone from the toddlers to the OAP’S were dropping it like it was dead hot. My personal highlight was Fuse ODG though, I love him, I think his songs are just dead happy – he really got the crowd going and although my fella is a bit of a music snob and only likes men with guitars, even he had to admit he was boss.

If you’ve never seen the Kodaline – High Hopes video then get your tissues ready…

The showers & toilets

Funkin Cocktails kindly sprung for the Club Class upgrade for us and I would have paid it ten times over. For £10 a visit or £30 for the whole weekend you had access to luxury showers and toilets. I mean, they were luxury compared to the portaloos anyway – I’d describe the standard as the portacabins in the Tatts at Aintree Ladies day. They queue for the showers was massive between 9 and 12 but outside those times it was sound. The best thing was the pamper tent – mirrors, hairdryers, straighteners and phone chargers on tap. Lifesavers.

The mud

Yeh it was muddy. #TopTip Dig your heels in as you’re walking to get a bit of purchase on the mud – it helps stop you slipping. For more festival hacks have a look here.

I don’t feel a picture of the mud is necessary so have a video of a hipster in odd shoes and a cape instead.

What else?

There was loads of other stuff going on, for all ages. Kids entertainment, cinema, jagertent, dance tent, glow parties, a fairground, a forest walk full of mad art. There was plenty to keep everyone amused.

Huge thank you to Funkin Cocktails once again for inviting me – the perfect festival drink! Pre-mixed cocktails are the perfect accompaniment to any glamping experience…


Scouse Bird

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