You may think that modern day feminists and those who point out everyday sexism are working towards the same goals, but I disagree. If you’d asked me a few years ago whether or not I was a feminist, looking at the people out there who were describing themselves as feminists, I’d have said no. Now I say ‘hell yeah I am’ – just in a far more positive way than they are. Rather than moan about the negatives (if you even perceive there to be any) I celebrate the positives of being a woman.
There are two things in the past year regarding this subject which have really irritated the life out of me; one is the whole ‘Ban the lads mags’ campaign and the other is this @everydaysexism account on twitter.
Let’s talk about the former first. The ban the lads mag campaign went under the guise that they want to stop the exploitation of women and also protect their children from seeing scantily clad models on the covers of lads magazines. My own personal theory is that it’s more to do with jealousy and feelings of insecurity on the part of the campaigners and their followers that they don’t look like the gorgeous women in these magazines and it just tears them up inside that men ogle these models rather than them, sat there in their baggy washed out primark tops and leggings. In fact I would counter challenge that these campaigners are in fact women who hate other women and therefore aren’t feminists at all. As for the exploitation theory, who’s more exploited here? The women who loves her job, showing off her figure, getting her boobs out for an hour or so and getting paid handsomely for it or the fully clothed woman who hates her minimum wage office job? If anything it’s the men who buy these magazines who are being exploited. As for protecting children, let me just say this, your children are no ones responsibility but your own. It’s not society’s job to sheild them from the realities of adult life. The magazines in question are already stacked way up out of their line of eyesight and when I was that age I was far more interested in the brightly coloured Beano and Dandy which were there to attract my attention. It’s not exactly in shops’ interest to advertise lads mags to a 7 year old is it? They want to EXPLOIT your children and get your money with magazines promising free toys and games. You could choose something like that to be angry about but honestly I think some people just enjoy being angry. If you don’t like something just turn away from it and get on with your life.
Now the @Everydaysexism account on twitter, Jesus, where do I start? This is another example of feminism gone wrong. Women getting on their high horse because men have DARED to appreciate their looks. It’s full of RT’s from people moaning because some lad they know has said they’ve got a nice arse, as if women don’t have a sly perv at mens arses! Go and shave your armpits and stop whinging girls. Take the compliment in the spirit in which it was intended. I don’t know anyone living in Liverpool who hasn’t at some point in their life had a lad shout, “Ay girl, gizza suck!” it’s a rite of passage growing up, before lads develop (not much) better social skills. I remember those days fondly in the same way I remember hanging round on the park or mobile phones that weighed 3 ton. Just laugh it off, it’s not a rape threat for christs sake it’s young lads having a laugh. If you are genuinely offended by something a man says, the feminist thing to do would be to tell him straight, there and then, not waiting and bitching to your other manhead mates on twitter about it. Surely that’s the opposite of girl power? If a lad offended me I’d cut him down where he stood. Look at some of the complaints women make:
If this is even, ahem, true Martha then you’re blatantly just showing off anyway. You quite clearly love it.
Again, showing off, you’re secretly thrilled.
This is such a strange non-complaint.
Quite clearly a joke. Go and give your head a wobble Rosie and stop being a crank.
Listen. I go the gym, I get my hair done, I dress nicely, for me, because it makes me feel good but I’ll fuckin fume if I don’t get a wolf whistle from a passing van once in a while. In nature, different species go out of their way to make themselves look attractive to the opposite sex in a term known as ‘peacocking’ – obviously named for the peacock (although it’s actually the male who has the gorgeous tail feathers). Why should humans be any different? Even as a straight women I can appreciate that women are the more beautiful sex, are we supposed to feel guilty now if we play up to that? Like we’re doing our gender a disservice. Uh-uh – I ain’t down with that. Making yourself look as ugly as possible to prove the point that you’re more than just looks isn’t feminism to me either. Feminism to me (as I explained in my interview with Chelsey Harwood here) is about being able and willing to do whatever the fuck you want to do.
Let me tell you a bit about me; at 20 I bought my own house, at 27 I bought another. At 28 I started my own company and I’m also following my childhood dream of becoming a writer. I’ve done all that on my own without the help of any man. I’ve worked in sales for the past 10 years or so and while in the companies I worked for, traditionally men topped the regional sales leagues, was I having that? Was I shite! I broke sales records and topped league tables just the same as them. I’d take on men as equals, not superiors. The thought that they were in anyway better than me never even crossed my mind, because they’re not! The fact that these women are out there crying sexism at every opportunity just, in my eyes, perpetuates the falicy that women are inferior. You want to prove we’re equal girls? Actions speak louder than words. When women claim that the world is unequal it makes me angry, it’s only unequal if you perceive and allow it to be that way. Inequality has literally never been an issue in my life.
The only problem I find with being a strong woman is finding a man who isn’t intimidated by me. I’d eat most men alive. It’s quite obvious I don’t NEED a man, whatever I want I can get for myself, but men like to be needed. It’s a primal thing. Am I a man hater though? Definitely not. I love men, I’m actually a hopeless romantic who’ll fall in love at the drop of a hat; on the proviso I meet someone compatible obviously. Does that make me weak? No, women are an emotional sex and I think within that lies a great strength and I embrace it. Just because you’re a strong woman doesn’t mean you have to be masculine either; I take great pride in my appearance as I’ve said, I do it for me and I do it to pull. There isn’t anything wrong with dressing nicely to attract a man…it’s kind of how the species has flourished. My world would be a much less entertaining place without flirting, it’s my favourite hobby.
In summary girls, dress how you want (including if you genuinely like dressing scruffily), sleep with who you want, DO what you want with your life – don’t be waiting round for a man and don’t let any so called “feminist” make you feel guilty for being a woman who enjoys a mans attention. It’s human nature, they’re the unnatural ones.