Feminist; the word alone fills me with a feeling of unease and also the urge to run away and hide from my iPhone/Laptop when it appears.
Sadly the world has gone mad for the principles of being a ‘Feminist’, often taking extreme measures to ensure that their view on feminism is the ‘right’ one. Let me start by saying that I am in no way educated to great lengths on feminism and the ways of the feminist world but I am a female. Considering the fact women all over the world are fighting for equal rights, I think us women need to band together!
My fear of the word feminism lies with the women who feel the need to take Feminism to the extremes, which sadly makes people (myself included) fear being known as a Feminist as people tend to not really understand its true meaning. I am forever reading articles and comments on social media that you can’t be a feminist if you believe in certain ways of life or fall into any categories that are strictly forbidden in the radical feminist’s world. These are some of the beliefs I see these women preaching.
You can’t be a feminist if you decide to pose semi or totally nude in a ‘Lads Mag.’ – because obviously no self respecting feminist would ever degrade themselves in such a way? SURELY?! This also goes for anyone in the industries similar to lads mags.
You can’t be a feminist if you are a size 0 – reasons being that you CLEARLY hate all women who are above a size 0 and think they are fat lazy cranks that binge eat on Dominos whilst crying silently into their side of Ben and Jerry’s and that makes you a woman basher so you definitely cannot be a feminist if you’re one of those.
You can’t be a feminist if you have a husband who works and you’re a stay at home mum – only women who are oppressed and controlled by their husbands do that, didn’t you know?!
You can’t be a feminist if you go out on a Saturday night drinking the bars out of Prosecco and Jager with seven cans of hairspray on your hair, two bottles of fake tan expertly applied and with heels bigger taller than a small child – because girls if you fall into this category you are clearly only wearing that makeup and styling yourself in that way to please a man and not yourself so you clearly don’t understand the feminist way!
I’m going to stop there before I get a little carried away and instead tell you my version of feminism and how I see it through my 23 year old eyes.
Feminism to me is the empowerment of women, whether they are tall, short, size 0 or size 22, a mother, a daughter, a sister. The belief that we are equal to our male counterparts and neither could live and coexist on this planet without the other. I live with the belief that all humans are equal, other than the fact we women got the raw deal by having to have periods and squeeze giant headed babies out of our moos of course (but don’t get me started on child birth!)
Fight for what you believe in, fight for your right to equal pay, and use the vote that women many years ago fought and died for but above all else make yourself happy without bashing other people’s ideas and opinions. Think of what you believe feminism to be and how you see it and make it your own. #FeminismMyWay!
I see my idea of feminism on a daily basis, whether it be the girl on Facebook posting her before and after shots from her diet and wanting that little bit of praise from her peers and her boss mates fill her feed with positive words, or the girl you meet in the toilets on a night out when you’re crying because your boyfriend won’t answer his phone, who tells you you’re gorgeous and to pick yourself up, get yourself a drink and enjoy your night.
I’m lucky enough to have a mum who raised me as an independent woman who can use a hammer, build flat pack IKEA items and lug different items of furniture about the house by myself, but that doesn’t mean I look down on women who have husbands, boyfriends, dads to do these things for them and think they are failing other women by not doing it themselves, we are all unique and that’s the beauty of it all!
MEN this bits for you, let your wife, daughter, sister, friends be the women they want to be, don’t belittle an independent woman for wanting to be just that, independent. Be glad that she’s not asking you to put that shelf up or build that new bed. (Though I might add, if I see a Spider I’m not independent and my son has had to be called in for reinforcements, that’s okay considering he’s only six isn’t it?!)
Don’t be a shit and call that girl in the bar an uptight crank either because she turned down your free drink, reality check; she’s got her own money and she’s earnt it herself and can buy her own Prosecco, but thanks though. Don’t let that dent your ego, you’ll be loving it in 6 months time when your girlfriend can buy her own Louboutins without sneaking out with your credit card whilst the footies on.
My point being is that we need to empower each other, build each other up, high five the girl who gets her kit off and gets paid to be in the Lads Magazines, give your mate the pat on the back she needs when she’s lost that 2lb, even when you know that she’s going to put it back on come Saturday nights 5am kebab, raise your daughters AND your sons to respect all women whether they make choices that you wouldn’t make yourself. There is no strict Feminist Bible that we all must bow down to; Feminism is what you make of it.
Maybe I am a feminist, maybe I’m not. I’m happy with being a female with opinions that matter, that’ll do me just fine. I’ll continue to wear my makeup, bleach my hair and take 100 selfies a day and on occasion write 1000 word rambling rants to save my sanity.
XOXO
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Scouse Bird says: Like this? Have a read of my controversial post on feminism that I published last year and the one I had to post the next day in response to “angry feminists”
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